Oi. Tired...

I finally got a call from casting so I went to be a dirty biblical era person again. Sorry, I can't post pictures. It's contrary to the contract I signed. I was just being a crowd person, when the director pointed and said "We need that guy in the gray up here". So up I went. I was wondering if I would be recognizable to anyone in these movies. Now I don't really have to worry. If they ever use the footage shot the other day, I'll be front and center. So that was a little comforting. I had a counselling role play this last class... didn't go so well. I feel kinda crappy about it. The "client" was a 17 year old kid, with some oppositional issues who was remanded by the court after breaking into a couple of homes with his friends. He feels like his mom is always on his back. Though I didn't always feel like my mom was fair, I had a really hard time with the client feeling that his mom was a "complete failure" and "Is trying to control all of my life". I had a bit of a hard time identifying with the client. As such, I didn't really get to the point of rapport with him. Crap. I need to remember that that is the most important part of this process. So... anyone a pro at powerpoint? Want to give me lessons? Because I sure am NOT a pro. And it seems that it is used ad nauseum in school now. Been thinking a lot lately about why I do things the way I do. Or not, as the case may be. I have far too difficult a time dealing with injustice in life. I need to get over things far more than I have been able to heretofore. I can't completely change the world and make it into what I would like it to be. But I have a very difficult time coming to grips and accepting things that I perceive as unjust or unfair, or completely unintelligent. I suppose I "do not suffer fools gladly". I think that the desire for things to be different is a good thing, but only if I really, REALLY am making an effort to change those things. To make sure that that difference is being made. If I am not, I guess I'm just crying into my metaphorical beer. I have really come to the realization that though I have the entrepreneurial spirit... I am not a businessman. There. I said it. I need to let someone else do the business side of things, and I need to be the "disciple", the "believer" of the business idea, and be the public proponent. Because I just don't do the other parts so well. I can come up with ideas, but I just don't have the know-how to get them off the floor. And I do come up with some good ideas. I am trying to be more honest with myself, to be more realistic about who I am, and what I want from life. I have wandered for too long, and the paths that I have wandered upon have often times taken me places that I didn't really want to go. I need a map. And I need to make that map.